How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
i just carried on a conversation with my mother from another room mid-ejaculation. you would have done the same
Just thought you should know in my puerto rico drunkenness yesterday I signed my dogs name on the bar tab. cruise = success
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
Currently putting together my outfit for this weekend, AKA a poster board that says "I'll cook you breakfast and do all your laundry, take me home." On front and back
I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
If he's dating my cousin now, do I have to erase the pictures of his dick off my phone? Ugh, morals.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
Randomize
