they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
it was like fucking with batman, he had gadgets i never even imagined
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
You walked up to me, grabbed my face and said "I just peed in the sink!"
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
At first I was nervous, then drunk me thought: What other chance will you realistically have to fuck a British guy?
I'll call you on my way home
Oh my god I'm going to die between now and then... can you at least tell me if y'all hooked up???
I threw up in my 8 AM. Morale is low.
He's asking how tall I am he wants to make a body suit out of me
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