I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
do you have any idea why i woke up naked spooning my toaster?
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
Life for us students isn't all fun and drunken lesbian affairs you know
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
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