If I see one more duchette wearing Ed Hardy, but not actually having a real tattoo. I swear Im gonna shank a bitch.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
I don't remember anything other than how good it felt when I peed my pants.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
I had to find out that I peed in the box of baby clothes from my mom, who found out from my grandma. New low.
Bruce the cab driver wants to take me on a date to see Taken 2
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
I took a 19 year old to a strip club and ended up in a three way. Divorced life might be OK.
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
Remember how slutty I thought she was when we were freshmen?
Yeah! But that was a long time ago. Plus, you use your sluttiness for good!
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