i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I really wanna punch him. Right in his cell-phone-sized penis
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Someday. I cant very well invite myself to his dorm room. And I'm 28. The excuses to be drunk and running into him at uconn are rather slim. Although I'm working on it.
Yea he called the cop officer fonzarelli and asked him if he was mad because happy days was off the air. Boom, beaten and arrested
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
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