You can't special order awesome
Don't worry about later. I already pre-ordered a pizza for a 1:45 delivery and told them to ignore any calls from your number.
You're getting good at this, you know that?
I have no idea where we are. But it doesn't look dirty so I don't think we are in jersey yet
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
I'm so annoyed. We're about to buy groceries for the week and at this point I'm hoping to sustain myself on pure alcohol.
You grabbed my shirt and said, "hope you're not attached" and ripped it off before I could answer you.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
The ass gains better be worth it
Randomize
