Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
oh great. the only prospects for sex left for the night are douchebag in the ed hardy shirt & frodo-looking ass
fuck it... i'll be the lord of his rings
I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
One of my coworkers just invited me to a wet t-shirt contest this weekend in honor of her son's 21st Birthday.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
Today is a wonderful day to be mildly hungover
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
Me and some guy are crying in a port a potty together after another guy broke up with both of us.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
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