And i was thinking, 'i'm happy to be underneath you, but i wish you weren't doing THAT.'
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
im not sure. I kicked him in the ear last night trying to kick a plastic cup off his head to prove I can kick higher than anyone.
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
Two people confessed their love to me last night. Drunk is a good color on me
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
So are you actually going to come fuck me in the ass this weekend, or was that just you being drunk in a kilt?
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
I think this Canadian beach volleyball player might be my soulmate. We could check each other's shoulders for melanoma.
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
If I'm getting through this pandemic I'm doing it drunk.
Randomize
