I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
i mean, we fucked on the futon in the garage where his band practices. pretty sure im now obligated to like his band on facebook.
she wrote "need hug!" on a sticky note, put it on her back, and passed out on his bed. they're trying to figure out how she got into his room...
they came at us with fireworks while we were skinny dipping in her jacuzzi at 4 am...
He did not want a thank you for helping me move in bj. I don't know how to thank him now.
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
he said he was going grocery shopping but when he came back all he had was a jumbo bag of pancake mix and case of beer.
the essentials, lol
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
I did not shave my legs to sit at home and diddle myself. He better wake the fuck up and put the fear of god in me!
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