I just blew up the bathroom at work and now I feel like a new woman
I admire a woman who can maintain dignity while puking after too much whiskey
I've walk of shamed through this apartment complex so many times, I think people think I live here.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
no normal human would even think about making waldo slutty but you
There needs to be waaaay more alcohol in my apartment if I am going to survive being unemployed
Bachelor party turned 19 hour search and rescue in the mountains. nbd
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
Turns out he has a 6pack too. Alright adorable snapchatting manwhore dude, you win.
Never underestimate the power of loudly proclaiming you want to make out with someone
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
Whoever was the bastard/bitch/genius who duct taped my keys to my dick so I wouldn't lose them. I hate you.
Hey Girl, we got home safe!
I know, I drove you
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