The answer to your question is yes. I am wearing a star of david to the bar in order attract a jewish man.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
This is the last pregnancy scare i've had since i was 12 and i thought you could get pregnant from masturbating.
It's official. I now have that "I was drunk and needed the money" college story to share later in life.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
What is the current exchange rate for ramen to jello shots?
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
I woke up on a boat next to an extremely attractive man wearing nothing but a life jacket. Neither one of us owns a boat...
I felt kinda awkward walking into his house in nothing but lingerie and my dead grandmas overcoat
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
I'm sorry for breaking our door. And being a bitch about it.
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
On a scale of "huh, that's interesting" to "holy porn stars, batman". How good?
Definitely closer to "holy porn stars, batman".
Randomize
