Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Only in Montana can you find Septic Services that would display "Christian owned and operated" on the side of the truck. I'm oddly going to miss this state.
She had been watching Bad Girls Club where the annoying girl always says "I RUN L.A.". After she got wasted she kept going up to strangers at the bar yelling "I RUN FAYETTEVILLE." I peed in her drink.
I imagine my 13 hours of sleep after my 3 day upper bender was similar to Jesus rising from the dead.
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
as he was fingering me, all I was thinking about was how lucky his girlfriend is...
someone cut his neck open pretty bad with a broken beer bottle. We were so close to his house that we carried him home, but when we got there he casually laid on his bed and said he was just gonna sleep it off. WHO DOES THAT
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
The only alcohol at my aunts was mikes hard so I drank 9 of them and puked in the master bath
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
I am certain that you would be a mere freckle on the behemoth of slutty that has taken place at this complex.
Randomize