bobby jindal makes me wanna cover my ears. you make me wanna smile.
so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
and then you made a playlist that was just "party in the usa" on repeat...
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
new years resolution, not be in jail at midnight for 3rd year in a row.
and now i get to think about how i fulfill a gay man's harry potter fantasy. thanks for that
The guy who was The Count on Sesame Street died this week too. Therefore, you should take multiple shots, count them, & go "ahh aaahh aaaahhh" after each one. I expect video...
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
Cats are difficult to handle. Also they are impossible to baptize.
I'm not in the business of asking people about their lizard
I meant his actual lizard not his manhood
I blame her lesbian super powers of coercion.
Randomize
