party was madd awkward.. it was like every person who i sat next to in high school and never said hi to was there
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
There is a such thing as a wonderpuss octopus. Officially my new favorite animal.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
she just totaled her parents new car because there was a bee in the car. So she crashed into a light pole to kill it.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
Neat. I'm thinking about growing a handlebar muffstache. What are your thoughts on this?
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
With a breakfast like weed and a fun size twix before a dentist appointment you can see exactly how I handle being an adult
Drove by a guy getting road head, midday on O Street. That could be us, but you won't let me in your pants when you drive.
oh my god you are days, if not hours away from a dick pic. This is the day the lord has made rejoice and be glad in it
So apparently Facebook just randomly finds the girl who gave me a hard handy despite having no mutual friends...
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
Randomize
