He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
My mom just used the words "ice cunt". It may be an interesting day afterall.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
Did you hear me? I HAVE THE CONTENTS OF AN NBA PLAYER'S CONDOM IN MY BEDROOM TRASHCAN!! This shit is potentially worth millions of dollars to a fertile young female who is ovulating. How do I sell it fast??
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
after all you did bang a few mechanics. you must have got some second hand skills by now for building us a go kart.
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
This will always be remembered as the Christmas I had 15 Russians sing christmas carols to me at 130am alone in a gas station while I was stoned on pot brownies
no he just sat there holding the hammer and grinning insanely
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
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