So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
I just spilled my beer all over my laptop.. this is what i get for actually trying to do homework
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
My vag wants to play a game of hungry hungry hippos with your cock.
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
No she had like 2 shots and started ironing her clothes and whispering random shit in my ear
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
That's all? I'm a pro at gay chicken. I'll touch his dick, I have no problem with that.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Let's just say that I took off my pants and I had superman boxers on. Then she took off her pants and she had batman panties on. I think she's the one!
She bruised my penis again. But, trooper I am we kept on going.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
Randomize
