...., I just tried brushing my hair wothh a toothbrushg. fail
ps not my toothbrush awkward.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
thanks for carrying me to bed.. and sorry for trying to roll down the hallway to escape.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
I don't want to go to sleep. I like partying with myself.
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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