everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
My favorite part was when he stopped, looked up in the middle of performing oral sex and asked, "you did know it was Arbor Day, right?"
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
He walked into the party with a case on one shoulder and a boom box on the other of course I fucked him
And a psychic told me I was pregnant and I am just so over life right now.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
this case of pbr just wont end. i keep finding more.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
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