I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
I'm sorry I came to your house drunk and fed pizza to your dog.
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
