ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
he came so fast he could have be employed at jimmy johns
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
I met her dad while holding 4 empty beer bottles at the opera house. I think I made a hell of an impression.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I give up. I can't handle that class sober any longer. I have an army of whiskey shooters for the next three weeks. Wish me luck.
My serious response to your Cathy tattoo inquiry- Do you ever want to get laid by someone not wearing a Blossom style bucket hat? Tattoo accordingly.
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize
