I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
i've counted 4 condom wrappers but only 3 condoms. not again.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
the girl next to me in class is drawing a guy banging a chick doggy style...its very detailed
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Yeah... I was considering changing that part but the boxed wine is non-negotiable.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
Is it bad that I see a party full of girls I know he has fucked as a challenge for me to be the one who ends up in his bed?
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
According to him, i kept saying "I'm belligerent as SHIT" and tried to run around the house in just my bra and underwear. Thats when they decided to carry me to the car and take me home.
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
we should most definitely have a fire extinguisher in the apartment. like... for sure
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