i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
Randomize
