I saw her while sober, and she is definately cut off from the penis ride
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Did you write your name in the dust on our toilet tank?
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
I'm going to pretend you don't watch My Little Pony and focus on your large cock. Kay? Don't bring it up again.
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
I'm only friends with her because I can't stop watching the train wreck.
Are you feeling better yet?
I need a nap and a new butthole
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I'd rather plunge my eyes out than acknowledge being related to either of my brothers
Randomize
