plz talk dirty to me
How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
You two were too busy to notice that his used condom landed on me when he threw it.. Thanks.
Drunk off five beers on a Tuesday. I'm not sure which part of that statement is more sad
In the middle of pouring my wine you asked me if I could hear your vibrator from my room.
The girl with a dislocated arm just did an assisted keg stand. You will never have an excuse again.
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
I just don't understand how she's willing to go through so much planning and effort just to get a dick inside of her
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
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