the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
The weird kid in front of me is reading an article titled "why don't i have a girlfriend?" the article then continues to talk about the mathematical equation for obtaining a girlfriend. exhibit a of why he is single
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Apparently tackling a bar stool and crashing to the floor while yelling for 6 shots of whiskey won't get you thrown out on St Pattys Day.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
you know it's gonna be a good 4/20 when you start saving up for it in january.
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Every single item that was in my fridge is now in my hot tub. Please help
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I've been here for three hours and I am already feeling sorry for whatever offspring i will indefinitely produce in this place.
I pray for you bro.
I have a present for you
Like a legit gift, not just me showing up and getting naked
he's had a change of heart. and besides, we could use a laugh.
oh, well, if you all need a good laugh, by all means endanger my life.
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
Randomize
