This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
I feel great
I just peed on a car
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
The make-up sex just reminded me why we broke up in the first place.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
I found out what happened to that girls weave last night. It was draped over a bush in my backyard.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
I ditched my one night stand in the hotel lobby. How did he add me on Snapchat?
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Randomize
