glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
i tried slipping money on her dresser whenever she brings guys home hoping she'll start to question her goals in life... i think its only encouraging her
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Just had to buy plan b w/ my robotic baby from family living.. Awkward.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
You coulda licked the floor this morning and got drunk.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
then looked at this little girl next to me and was like "don't drink when you get older and don't let your best friend be with assholes." she looked at me like i was crazy
Just found my glass of wine on top of the litter box. Every argument ever is invalid.
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Randomize