I'm curled up in a ball on the floor of my office with the lights off. I hope no one notices. No more open bar. Woof.
dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
the police dropped me off. that's how my night went.
I am mentally ready for anal.
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
So what if is hockey, you don’t turn down sex with a professional athlete. They work out all day and have amazing stamina. Your vagina will thank you!
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