Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
Dancing naked to Celine dion - im alive. No better way to start the day
Here's a tip. Don't party with someone that needs sexual attention. Drinking and sexual attention don't mesh well in the morning. Especially over a bowl of Cheerios.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
He told me he was my brother roommate in college after we fucked, but already knew that so I had pretend I didn't know that.. like how I pretended I finished. 2/10
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
I woke up wearing nothing but my red thigh high socks and a blue wig. I have no idea what happened.
Randomize
