he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
you were so drunk you tried to use the microwave as a calculator for your BAC
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
i realized really quickly that drinking a bottle of vodka and 3 crystal light packets wasn't the best idea i've ever had
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
I'd cum everywhere if I could have chicken nuggets right now
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
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