He asked to "fluff my boner.."
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I had a dream last night, there was a gumball machine that was filled with Oxycontin. I would try to get some but got vitamins instead. I was so frustrated!! woke up angry.
So I had to explain to her that pussy doesn't mean a cat
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Seriously can I go through one convo where masturbating doesn't come up
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
I can't be held responsible for what I do for you after a blowjob like that.
Randomize
