At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
Just saw the stripper pole on the road that we threw out of the party bus last night
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
Bring a bathing suit and your good liver.
My good liver is still at the dry cleaners. Will my backup liver suffice?
Maybe
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
Randomize