and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Just hit him with your car. I can guarantee he won't do it again.
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
Well, our assistant supervisor caught us on the back stairs...he invited us on a double date with his fiance and him. I guess our job approves of the relationship?
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
My manager said you offered to make out with him to ensure I keep my job if I didn't show up to work today
I just got a text from a guy. The python is ours if we want.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
I woke up this morning fully clothed with a dart in my pocket
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
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