I've never had a man I enjoyed more than steak
The only thing I want to hear out of a girl's mouth tonight is, "slurp".
walk of shame with early morning football tailgaters. niice.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Apologies for hacking your facebook and posting that picture of you passed out hooked up to the IV...but we were sat with you on the ER floor for 3 hours, it got boring
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I woke up to a text that said, "I can see you but can't get in." It was the pizza delivery guy who saw me passed out drunk on the floor through the front door.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
Do you ever get a cramp in like, ONE labia?
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
