My unemployment check should really just be direct-deposited into the checking account of my drug dealer
dear vagina, thank you for making it so goddamn hard to get pregnant. i love you.
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
He's just sitting there staring at my sisters teddy bear hoping it will come to life.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
I know it's wrong but I'm human. Now get over here, tie me up, feed me pizza and Fuck the crazy out of me. Please.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
I can't talk, I can't walk, I think I'm twitching and I'm not even sure if I'm typing this. Help
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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