I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
he's sitting on top of the fridge in only a black speedo and wont get down
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
First funeral I've ever been to where the cops had to come.
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
Good thing my vagina doesn't have a chronometer on it. I'm sure my fiance would be horrified. Probably 10 miles from this past weekend alone.
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
He's here walking around DRUNK AS FUCK in a Kobe Bryant number 8 jersey... Tucked in.
You were leaning against a fire hydrant asking people if they wanted to buy free pocket peanuts from you.
Randomize
