god help us all. i just saw an infant wearing a onesie that said "i don't know who my daddy is"
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
So the answer to your question is yes, I was masturbating on the roof of my building.
No matter what you may say to me. You will still be the guy that managed to get his own cum in his hair.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
Well I can't message him and be like "hey I was behind you in CVS a month ago and I remembered your last name and DOB and looked you up on fb and added you so wanna hang out"
I knew things were bad when my gyno recommended meditation.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
You threw up with such class too! Tiara and all.
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Randomize
