my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
just woke up in the beanbag bin at walmart
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
I think his roommates are using word magnets to tell me that they can hear us. His fridge currently says, "Chris ate out naughty girl."
Karaoke machines out. We're taking turns farting into the microphone. Shits going south fast. Definitely be awake when you get home.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
He stopped eating me out to remind me to look at the stars
No one can touch me, I'm made of fruit.
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