Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
stripped for him at 3am on my childhood playground and used the swing set as a pole.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
i just unblacked out cuddled in a pita pit booth with ten dollars rubberbanded to my hand.
He said he has something to give me... I swear to God if it's a joint or a framed picture of his penis i'm going to kill him
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Well at least it wasn't the first time I threw up out of a second story window
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Cassie is wearing a baseball cap. This rebound is going nowhere
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
I brought her cheeseburgers and tequila but she's still mad at me.
I just found glitter glue on my jesus bracelet...am I really that gay?
Randomize
