We should be called the Road Head Warriors
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Way to high for badminton right now. This is gonna be a shitshow.
I honestly don't know if ill make it through the next two hours. The hangover is strong with this one.
I was a battlefield of empty bottles and bodies. We though we won, but the booze had the last laugh.
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I met her at the quidditch match. She was the snitch and I caught her. After at the bar she walked up grabbed my hand and said snitches have flesh memories.
I'm drunk and I have your birth certificate
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
Good morning 7am walk of shame. It's been awhile.
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Randomize
