I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
Wow. This hand sanitizer smells awesome. It's like I just gave a handjob to a fruit basket.
If you are drunk already, then as your friend I am advising you to stop writing on your dads Facebook wall
I got shot at last night. Lesson about married chicks: learned.
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
So far I consider it a great summer because I have had to buy Plan B a total of zero times
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
It was probably the night you were half naked and trying to blow everybody, guy or girl.
this is me we're talking about here. You're going to have to be more specific than that.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
