Dork........ .......... .. . ...... ........... .. . ... ...... .. . .... ..... .. .... ... .......... .... . . ..... Yeah its morse code, no big deal
well apparently i yelled MY VAGINA WAS ANNIHILATED and his whole family heard
He played with my vagina like it was a turntable
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Im sitting alone watching titanic. Drunk. Without pants. Holding a fishing pole. Im pretty sure im okay with all of this.
I came home drunk to my night light on and a Hershey's bar on my bed. Mom knows me too well.
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
I think my moral compass just broke
At this point, I would not mind getting hit by a truck. It would mean I could get this over with quicker.
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