capt morgan doesn't hurt if you honestly believe it's golden flavored kool-aid.
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
There's a really old guy here with a really young girl. I'm guessing he has to make choo choo train noises to get his dick in her mouth.
What bar did i puke in last night
by bar you must mean bars and by in you must mean on
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
Just saw some lesbians get in a fistfight in an Arby's parking lot. It's good to be home.
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
TFW YOU ACCIDENTALLY SEND A MEME ABOUT LIKING ANAL TO THE GROUP CHAT. JESUS FUCKING CHRIST, WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?
Hahahaha. He sent me a dick snap in the lululemon stockroom. What is life. If this works out, this could benefit everyone....
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
At some point you said you just wanted to get laid, so we had a moment of silence for your dead sex life...
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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