i wanna do a homemade sex video in sepia and pretend were in the early 20th c
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
I feel my soul being ripped out of my eye sockets
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
HE PEED ON ME. THE MANAGER OF THE BAR.
Can I get my morals surgically removed?
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
I think next time I give head I'm gonna try making the chewbacca noise.
I look forward to it
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
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