the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
Then she opened the door and pitched the dead squirrel out, yelling "TELL THE OTHERS WHAT YOU SAW"
i'm not the one sitting naked in my room playing with my boobs and a cat.
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
I'm a 23 year old virgin. I've masturbated in ways you can't even imagine.
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
His hands kept asking for sex, but all I could think was "dude, this is going to ruin my high".
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I received a sext from my girlfriend, and a deal for free chips and guacamole at chipotle at the same time. I have tasted heaven, and it is beautiful.
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
I just paid $10 for tinder plus so that I could change my location to Rio and match with Olympic Athletes
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
