idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
So excited for tonight I might actually pee my pants BEFORE I get blackout
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
Staying in I think. Boyfriend has domesticated me. I'm making eggs naked right now. Also really high.
I IMAGINED YOU YELLING SURPRISE WITH JAZZ HANDS. AND I LOVE YOU FOREVER
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
She's trying to sext her husband for the first time. I'm feeding her lines. It is 3 am and I am playing Cyrano for my wasted big sister TELL ME I AM NOT THE BEST SISTER IN LAW ON THE PLANET.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I'm experimenting with sincerity
I’ve had a lot of vodka, 3 different dicks and no food since last night. Come get me
I have had flashes of 69ing, a strawberry flavored condom and begging him to sleep naked.
Randomize
