He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
I have "you made mistakes last night" written alllll over me.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
He plays D&D and his dick should be carved out of marble. I think I'm in love.
I gave her two orgasms and then we laid there and she ate jelly beans out of my belly button...that girls a keeper
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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