We won't sleep together?
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
and then he said that some chick told him he danced like an epileptic on crystal meth. he then proceeded to demonstrate this statement, which i can testify is 100% accurate.
literally every day that goes by where he doesn't talk to me makes me more determined to get him to have sex with me
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I haven't had an orgasm since 2014. So you cam see why I'm having a bad year.
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Currently sifting through all the dick pics and nudes for a picture of my dad and I to post on social media for Father's Day...
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
