Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
I like yr title more along "the hot Russian I have sex with."
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I wanna get freshman fucked up and do shady things on the last Friday of my youth.
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
SEXX, SEXX, SEXX,SEXX,SEX SEX SEXXXXXXX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEXSEX SEXSEXSEXSEXSEX.\nimagine that to the can can song. also come to my house. theres a dance routine.
You introduced her by saying, "This is the girl who sexes me." Then you passed out on the coffee table.
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
He was standing in the living room wearing a Donald Trump wig and looking very disappointed
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
like, there were so many other better not terrible choices you could have made, so i'm honestly baffled that you managed to fuck up that bad
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
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