I just used Master P to describe what sound the letter U makes to my daughter...
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I'm taking her home. She just told a 90 yo woman in a packers hat to "suck her cock".
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
Just pissed by glowstick light. Bad idea.
Being home sucks. I haven't drank in like a week. Or smoked cigs. Or done drugs. Or had sex. My body is shutting down.
Omg. It's like you're one of those deprived kids living in a third world country. We need to save you.
No, not normal drunk. Wake up on a trampoline with a naked chick you've never seen before drunk. I think i missed my first trampoline sex...
Ended up getting hot boxed in a limo with a bunch of asians going to a karaoke bar. I think I pretended to understand their language for a solid hour. Am I bilingual now?
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
Randomize
