I may just buy something cuz i have 6 weddings in the next year and a half.
Holy shittt I don't even have a bf
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
seriously though jaeger and i are fucking done professionally
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
Yeah. Not my best idea. But I'm hoping for the best . And by best, I mean not jail
I praised you last night for winning a chug off...you thanked me with a ridiculously hard headbutt. Thanks dick.
My roommate definitely just walked in on me playing the piano naked.
By piano you mean.....
Like literally a piano.
Ohhhh that's kind of embarrassing.
We need to get Harry and Lloyd's tuxedos from Dumb and Dumber. I feel like this is a vital thing that is missing from our lives.
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
Randomize
