she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
some guy just walked up to the bench i was on, backflipped off of it, gave me his number and walked away....i love this city
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
We all make mistakes. Just lock them up deep down inside your mind so they can surface as weird sexual fantasies it takes your therapist years to decipher when your 40
All I know is that every time I looked at my glass it was full again and I thought it would be rude not to drink it
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Couldn't find my swimsuit top anywhere this morning but finally found it in the skimmer of the pool so thats how my night apparently went
Well ill be drunk so just come find me. Its like where in the world is Joey San Diego
I vaguely remember us chasing shots by licking each other's faces last night. Our friendship has reached another level completely.
I'm just down here gazing up into your ivory tower of nudes
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
My plan to hit on all your friends went to shit after the 3rd dirty martini.
Randomize
