Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
Dont touch anything! You just got rid of your crabs!
dude i need help, im throwing up blood.
no youre not, you just drank a pitcher of red koolaid trying to sober up.
oh, so thats why my junks red.
wow. cant help you there...
i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
Breakfast is bomb, yo. McDonald's before ten thirty is like Katie Holmes before Tom Cruise.
I don't know how but I have our hotel room door handle in my purse... this can not be good
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
he's listed in a fb relationship with a girl born in 1993. i'm too drunk to do the math on that one, but i am sober enough to know that's illegal
Thank God I did Vegas bombs with those cops at their Christmas party. We should so be in jail.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
You said you were going inside to sober up and then you poured yourself a wine glass of warm gin
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize