I never want a future conversation of ours to include the words "quart of semen" in it
And then he asked me why the subtitles were in Arabic. The television was off.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
He's eating a cream cheese sandwich. He's obviously distressed.
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
Dude, she brought over peach cobbler, weed and alcohol plus I'm gonna get laid. She's by far the coolest sister you have.
well this is gonna sound really bad but we were fooling around on sandra's electrical wheelchair
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
We need to get me chipped asap
Randomize