It would be been irresponsible not to make cleaning the apartment into a drinking game
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
No, this time she was diabetic. I think I fucked her into diabetic shock.
Recent Google searches: "babu kangarooz"... "why 2 tacos bell" and "is dinosaur in real life"
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
she said she just "wanted a guy who she could cook breakfast for". HUGE MISTAKE. I'm never leaving
I've never been so excited to have my ass in so much pain.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Randomize
